To Fix the System, Coach Men on Gender Issues Too

iStock_000016827030XSmallBy Tina Vasquez (Los Angeles)

This past April, the management consulting firm McKinsey & Co. released a report stating that inadequate career development has kept women from reaching the top ranks of the corporate ladder. The findings were based on a 2011 survey of 2,525 college-educated men and women, including 1,525 individuals employed by large companies. According to McKinsey, companies must groom female middle managers for advancement. Joanna Barsh, a McKinsey senior partner who co-wrote the report, said companies need to “spend more time coaching women and offering more leadership training and rotation through various management roles before their ambitions sour.” Other recommendations to remedy the problem included having more women seek out mentors, as well as “putting women in programs that would help them develop and get over the next promotion hurdle.”

According to Marcia Reynolds, a master certified coach, the problem is that these recommendations primarily focus on fixing the women, instead of on fixing the system that created the problem. In her column addressing the McKinsey report, Reynolds even cites a recent Harvard Business Review article that found that companies that are committed to putting women through mentoring and training don’t necessarily promote them; they just make them busier. This is something echoed by career coach Roy Cohen, who says that many women – and men – go through coaching programs and don’t get promoted for a variety of reasons and it’s unfair to expect high-ranking women to personally reach out to women currently climbing the corporate ladder.

“There aren’t enough women in the top ranks of corporations and those who are there are already stretched too thin,” Cohen said. “Just because a woman has become successful doesn’t mean we should set a different standard for her. Women should be able to be as political and self-serving as their male counterparts. There’s this double standard where we expect women to take the higher road, but it’s unfair to burden them with these responsibilities. Women should be able to behave as badly as men. We set women on pedestals – and then look at their flaws.”

Relying on women to fix the system isn’t going to work – and it’s not fair. Shouldn’t men be engaged in this effort as well?

Fixing the System that Created the Problem

Reynolds believes that by fighting for the status quo instead of heralding in changes that affect power structures, leaders are maintaining their sense of control. “The current leaders aren’t doing this maliciously to keep women out, but I think the push to give women coaching is based on male leaders trying to demonstrate that they are doing something for women,” Reynolds said. “It’s a check on the list.”

Part of the solution then, isn’t only pushing women to obtain coaching, but rather to coach male leaders as well. Reynolds says that by having men and women attend leadership training together and mixing levels within the organization, it will increase the respect they have for one another, especially if the training includes interactive exercises enabling them to get to know each other outside of the workplace. Ideally, training will last from six to 12 months and it will ensure full participation and that men are not dominating the conversations.

“Creating these experiences sets up a state of mutual reliance and collective learning that breaks down gender barriers. It also serves to align everyone around common goals. When people get to know and respect each other as humans, differences disappear,” Reynolds said.

Cohen also asserts that coaching men and women together can be valuable because it allows people to vent safely and to experiment with ideas and strategies without being penalized. “It’s like a safe laboratory,” Cohen said. “It’s invaluable for men and women, but it’s not a band aid. When coaching is used as a band aid, the company is looking for a fix and success won’t be possible for anyone if you’re starting out with a problem.”

Who’s Doing it Right?

Cohen is currently working with a company outside of New York that takes what he calls a gender-blind approach to coaching and according to the coach, he’s never encountered so many happy, smiling workers.

Rather than focusing on just men or just women, the company simply seeks out the most passionate people regardless of their gender and coaching sessions consist of an equal mix. Women and men are able to voice their opinions, concerns, and perceptions in a constructive way and without fear of judgment. In what Cohen refers to as “inspired leadership,” the company head also seeks out truly versatile employees with a wide array of talents and skills and gives them the opportunity to advance or make lateral moves that will still prove to be important career-building opportunities. For example, an employee may go from sales to the head of HR because the company head or someone in upper management saw something in them that assured them they could do it.

“Obviously, this requires a great deal of faith by the leader, but by taking the chance on their employees, they’ve created this wonderful community where employees and upper management are less apt to see gender and more apt to see skills, talents, and potential,” Cohen said.

According to Reynolds, one firm that’s got the right idea is Deloitte. As a matter of fact, when Reynolds wrote in her column that “all leadership training should have one day focused on men and women dialoguing about their needs, desires, and challenges so they can move forward together,” she got the idea from Deloitte, who Reynolds says has been treating this problem as situational, as opposed to biological, for 20 years.

The company has an ongoing cycle of analysis, action, beliefs, outcomes, and discrepancies and every few years they modify their programming in order to match the needs of the evolving workforce and to increase parity. Reynolds believes that through training and networking, Deloitte has improved how men and women understand each other so that everyone can unearth their subtle biases and stereotypes and create new beliefs that are more real and inclusive.

Coaching isn’t the path to success for women, especially not when its main focus is excluding men from the process and teaching women how to work within the system that failed them. However, that’s not to say that coaching can’t be beneficial.

“Women can benefit greatly from coaching. A coach can help women unearth and give voice to their real selves, which include natural female tendencies of compassion, connection, and vision. Taking an approach that involves men and women isn’t about fixing women. It’s about providing a space for women to feel confident being a leader, when ‘leader’ is an ambiguous and evolving concept,” Reynolds said. “Acting like a man worked – until it didn’t anymore.”